The Secret to a Happy Relationship

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything.
They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little
old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had
cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but
one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said
she would not recover.

In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took
down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside
She agreed that it was time that he should know what was
in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls
and a stack of money totaling $95,000.

He asked her about the contents. 'When we were to be married,'
she said, ' my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage
was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you,
I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.'

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two
precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two
times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with
happiness.

'Honey,' he said, 'that explains the doll, but what about all of this money?
Where did it come from?'

'Oh,' she said, 'that's the money I made from selling the dolls.'

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods;
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death, because I don't have time to crochet.

The Yaya Diaries

1.       Yaya buys food at McDo.   
Crew: “Dito niyo na po ba kakainin?”   
Yaya: “Puwede sa table?” 
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2. Kid: “Yaya look, boats!”   
Yaya: “Dows are not boats, dey’re yachts.”   
Kid: “Yaya, spell yachts?”   
Yaya: “Yor rayt, dey are boats.” 
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5. My mom asked our yaya to buy Inquirer and Star.   
Our yaya came back and said: “Ma’am, wala pong Inquirer   
kaya bumili nalang po ako ng dalawang Star!” 
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6. Yaya: “Huhuhu…”   
Ate: “O, bakit ka umiiyak?”   
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!”   
Ate: “Eh bakit ka ba tinitighiyawat?”   
Yaya: “Kasi po di ako makatulog sa gabi.”   
Ate: “O, bakit ka di makatulog?”   
Yaya: “Kasi po may pinoproblema ako…”   
Ate: “Ano naman ang pinoproblema mo?”   
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!” 
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7. (Earlier) Mom: “Yaya, lagay mo yung pesto sa ref!”   
(Later) Son: “Yaya, nakita mo PS2 ko?”   
Yaya: “Nasa ref, pinalagay ng mama mo!” 
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9. After watching a movie, our yaya blurted out :   
“Ang pangit naman, happy ending!” 
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10. Sir: “Yaya, gawa mo ko ng kape. Yung decaf ha!”   
Yaya: “Siyempre naman, alangan namang de-baso!”
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11. Mom: “Yaya, magluto ka na pag-alis ko ha!”   
Yaya: “Ano po lulutuin ko?”   
Mom: “It’s up to you.”   
(During dinner) Mom: “Yaya, bakit ketsup at tuyo ang ulam?”   
Yaya: “Diba nung tinanong ko kayo kung anong lulutuin ko,   
sabi niyo, ‘kitsup tuyo’!” 
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13. Our yaya sa sari-sari store: “Miss isang Coke in can   
at isang Sprite na Coke in can…” 
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14. SIR: “Inday, si sir mo to, nabangga kotse ko & I need cash!”   
INDAY: “Aru, dugo-dugo gang ka no?”   
SIR: “Gaga! Si sir mo talaga to!”   
INDAY: “Gago ka rin! Si sir ang tawag sa kin…kapkeyk…” 
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15. I once asked my yaya where the Netherlands is located.   
She answered: “Diba dun nakatira si Peter Pan?” 
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16. “O yaya, bakit ka umiiyak?”   
Yaya: “Ati, sabi kasi ng duktor, tatanggalan ako ng butlig!”   
Ate: “Eh yun lang pala eh! Bakit ka umiiyak?”   
Yaya: “Buti kung one lig lang, eh kung butlig, wala na kong ligs!” 
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17. We saw our yaya staring intently at the orange juice bottle.   
Sabi namin: “Yaya, anong ginagawa mo?”   
Yaya: “Shhh! Nakalagay sa bote, ‘concentrate’…” 
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19.. My mom was going to buy our yaya a transistor radio.   
Before my mom left the house, our yaya said,   
“Ma’am, ang kunin niyo yung Ilokano ang salita ha!”
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20. We paid for the tuition fee of our yaya’s son.   
So one day I was reviewing him: “The Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun.   
Ano ang katabi ng Mercury?” His mom, our yaya, answered:   
“Parang Watson’s yata…” 
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21. Sir: “Yaya, natanggal mo yung mantsa sa barong ko?”   
Yaya: “Opo! Tanggal na tanggal!”   
Sir: “Good! Anong pinang-tanggal mo?”   
Yaya: “Gunting, kuya! Gunting!” 
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22. Yaya to tricycle driver: “Magkano sa City Hall?”   
Driver: “Ikaw lang?” Yaya: “Ay bakit, hindi ka sasama?” 
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23. (Si Kuya pumasok sa kuwarto ni Yaya)   
Kuya: “Yaya…”   
Yaya: “Koya, wag po! Wag Pooooo!”   
Kuya: “Gaga! Uutusan lang kita!”   
Yaya: “Si Koya naman…nagsa-suggest lang…” 
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24. Kid: “Yaya, spell orange?”   
Yaya: “Depende. Yung kulay o yung prutas?” 
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25. Midget Yaya who was newly hired:   
“Suwerte po kayo, ako ang napili niyo...   
At least kung maibagsak ko si baby, mababa lang!”
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2 7. (after being scolded for breaking her promises):   
“Ma’am, hindi na po ako mangangako ulit…promise!” 
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28. We had a yaya who claimed she was being courted by a kapre   
in her province and wanted to take her to his kingdom.   
Her reason for turning down the offer to be his queen?   
“Kapre yun ma’am, malaki ang kwan nun! Wag na uy!” 
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29. AMO: “Bakit namatay ang aso?”   
MAID: “Pinaliguan ko po ng laundry soap.”   
AMO: “Nakamamatay ba yun?”   
MAID: “Ewan ko nga po eh, pag-off ko ng washing machine patay na.” 
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30. Amo: Yaya use COOLING PLACE in a sentence.     
Yaya: Sir! viry easy! iksample nagring yung phone,   
(ring, ring, ring,) Yaya answered, " HILO , WHO'S COOLING PLACE?"

LOVE

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

- Neil Gaiman

from Bob Marley *from Kich*

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. 

You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. 

When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. 

They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. 

Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. 

There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. 

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. 

Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. 

In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. 

Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. 

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. 

You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. 

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. 

You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. 

Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. 

Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life